How To Handle Being Lied About
“When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.”
1 Peter 2:23
Nobody likes to be lied about, it doesn’t feel good. And with the invention of social media, it’s very easy to post or tweet a lie, and then have others read it as if it’s the truth. Even going on to like it, comment on it, or share it, for the lies to be compounded.
I’m a grown man, and social media lies effect even my life negatively; so I couldn’t even imagine what today’s kids in school feel like when a rumor gets started online.
Heck, back in the 1990’s, (when I was in school), if you wanted to tell a lie about someone to get a rumor started, you had to actually tell a person face-to-face, call them, or pass them a note, then the rumor-mill began to churn.
Now, cowards can simply get on their phone, tablet, or computer to stir up a hornet’s nest. When I think about today’s kids, my heart goes out to them. What a tough way to live out what is a very trying time anyway, transitioning from a child into an adult. It’s no wonder teenage suicide is so high.
So what do we do about this? When someone lies about us?
“LET’S GET ‘EM BACK!”
“AIN’T NO ONE GONNA TALK ABOUT ME LIKE THAT!”
For years, that’s how I handled such issues. My knee-jerk response was to scramble, defend myself, and retaliate. BUT, now I recognize where all lies come from: The devil and his crew. Jesus said that he is “the father of lies,” and that there is “no truth in him” (See John 8:44).
“So Matt, you’re saying that every time someone lies, they are possessed by the devil?”
No, that’s not what I’m saying, and let me back up a step here; yes, they can be possessed by a demonic force (whether strong or weak, we open up windows for them to join us through our five senses), but more than likely, the person who is lying is not possessed.
What I’m saying is the devil influences us, spiritually, in our minds. You are a spirit (not just flesh) and a spiritual battle is happening at all times of the day and night (See Ephesians 6:10-17).
The devil lies to us, spiritually, every chance he gets; and if we don’t recognize those lies, eventually we begin to believe them as truth – then, we start to act on them. After we start to act on them, we start to speak out these lies, regularly, as if they are now truth. It’s all down hill from there.
Jesus said that the devil has only three main goals for his existence: KILL, STEAL, DESTROY (John 10:10). You can apply one, or all of these three things to anything good in your life, and if there is suffering, the devil is in the midst of it. To top it off, he knows how to bait you the best, causing even more trouble for you through temptation.
HOWEVER! In the very same breath, Jesus said, … “but I HAVE COME so that you may have LIFE and have it ABUNDANTLY!” (John 10:10). Another version says, “…so that you may enjoy your life and have it to the fullest!”
And another version of the Bible even says, “My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.”
A rich and satisfying life! That’s good! That’s what we all want! So just how do we allow Jesus to give us this gift of a rich and satisfying life?… Not through lies, or responding to lies, but, through the truth! And Jesus said that’s what He is! The noun version of truth! A person! A walking, talking, TRUTH.
Jesus said that He is “the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6). So let’s break that down so we can have this rich and satisfying life He’s talking about:
- “The way”. The way to what? To heaven! And to a peaceful, confident, abundant life! When we do things His way, we get what He wants to give us! When we don’t do things His way, we can expect the opposite.
- “The truth”. Jesus didn’t just say that His words are the truth, but that He is the truth! How amazing is that?! We serve a God who is truth. So when we begin to speak His Words over our lives, the lies of the devil stand no chance. This truth builds confidence in us, and it also purges our hearts of our sin. We don’t just apply the truth of Christ to others, but to ourselves – always. First, and mainly, ourselves. We need truth. It’s good.
- “The life”. We’ve all heard the saying, “Aaaaaahhh, this is the life….” It is a phrase that most say when they are sipping a pina colada on the beach, or relaxing on a Sunday afternoon. But Jesus wants you to have days like that EVERY SINGLE DAY! He wants you to enjoy your life in times of testing, in times of trials and difficulty, in times of rebuilding, and even in the mundane times of our regular lives – eat, sleep, work, repeat. He came to give us the life because that’s what He is, THE LIFE!
And that wonderful life happens through trusting Him. It happens through acting, and reacting, how He would, even when someone lies about you. So if you’re not a Christian, or if you are a Christian who simply refuses to apply any of Christ’s teachings to your life, when someone lies about you, all bets are off.
Your mindset will be: “Sick em!” And that is exactly what you’ll do. There is no peace in that, and the devil wins in even greater ways.
But if you love Jesus, you’re not allowed to fire back, but instead, you should immediately begin to pray that the person lying about you would get SO blessed by God, that they would come to love Him for all He’s done.
Then, they’ll want to live for Him and make good choices, because they love Him – not because they fear Him, but because they genuinely love Him.
This is why Jesus tells us to bless those who curse us, and pray for those who mistreat us (Luke 6:28). It’s because He knows that if they begin to love God, then they’ll change. And they’ll change for the right reasons.
My friend, I know it hurts, but you’re gonna be fine; God is using this for a good purpose. You simply have to give it time, and let Him work it out. Go to Him for your comfort; don’t go to an addiction, or anything else, or, anyone else. He is your strength! Tell Him, “This hurts very badly, but I trust you.”
He will be quick to respond with, “Everything is gonna be okay, eventually, you’ll see.”
Try to remember: God wants to use this situation to strengthen your faith skills, and to make you more like Christ! He is preparing you for even greater things! That is, if you will respond as He approves. The devil, on the other hand, wants you to respond to the lies of others in a way that will destroy you. So be sure to choose how you will respond, and choose wisely.
Speaking of “choose wisely,” a prayer that you should be praying in a situation like this is, “God, please give me the wisdom to be able to handle this like you would. Please, mold me into a wise person.”
Why pray for wisdom? I mean, if you don’t have any, naturally, aren’t you out of luck? NO! Not at all. God will actually give you some!
The Bible says that “If you lack wisdom, you should ask God for it, and He will give it to you generously, without finding fault” (see James 1:5). So PRAY! And keep praying! Pray for wisdom! Pray for strength! Pray for confidence! Pray for joy! Pray for peace! He will give ALL OF THESE THINGS TO YOU! And NO weapon formed against you will prosper! Even puny little lies, from the devil.
A prayer for you: God I want to thank you for another day alive. What a gift it is to have yet another chance to impact this world for Jesus. Thank you for using me. Right now, I lift up all who are reading this directly to you. So many of them have believed the lies of the devil about themselves. And I know that there are also many people who have been horrifically lied about, slandered, and unfairly treated by others. AND, I know you see that! You are just! You are sovereign! And I pray right now that you strengthen them in their inner-being! FILL THEM UP WITH THE STRENGTH OF THE HOLY SPIRIT! Give them hope! Give them truth! Give them comfort, confidence, and peace! YOU ARE GOOD! And we know that what the enemy tries to use for our harm, you use for great things! YOU are the truth. Help us to live OUT this truth, each and every day. In Jesus’ name, amen.
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